hello,
Im after some advice - or even jsut a bit of reassurance to be honest!
ive lived in france for nearly 2 years, and live in a rented appartment!
Since living there i have had a number of incidences with a neighbour who lives downstairs.
most the people in my building are friendly and pleasant, smiling and saying hello when ever we pass eachother in the foyer.
this neighbour has not once smiled at me in the whole time i have lived there, and only speaks to me when she thinks she has cause to complain!

I cannot help but feel her intolerance and unpleasant manner towards me has something to do with the fact im not french! SHe looks at me with real contempt and makes no effort with the usual pleasantries one expects from those living around you!
Im not sure if i am breaking some kind of cultural rules in the way i live my life, but having lived by myself and sharing accomadation in a number of flats over the last 10 years and never once having any issues with complaints i find it hard to believe im doing anything wrong or unacceptable!
i find her manner when she ' complains' extremely unfriendly and confrontational......so much so that i actually dread passing her in the foyer of my building incase she has found something else to complain to me about!
I feel she is trying to intimidate me.....and she clearly dislikes me...could it be because im a foreigner in her country??

has anyone any suggestions of how i might deal with her?
My french is pretty good, but i find it hard to stand my ground in a confrontation in french!


for those who want details as to what happened here you go:
the first incidence was not long after i moved in, when she complained about the level of noise on 2 occasions. ...on both occasions I had a couple of girlfriends over for dinner..and didnt believe we were being especially noisy...eaitng talking with low level music in teh background..my neighbour was extremely inpolite in the manner she complained - ringing my doorbell relentessly untill i answered the door, and then complaining about the noise of chairs on the floor, runnign water, music, loud voices etc! she also came round the following morning to repeat her complaint!

Since then she has accused me of throwing cigarette ends over my balcony onto the lawn outside her window...actually she complained to me saying it was my boyfriend!
i asked my partner he confirmed it wasnt him, and he suggested maybe it was the result of a party that had happened upstairs over the weekend, but in the meantime my neighbour had collected all the cigarette ends and sprinkled them outside my front door!!
I explained to her that the cigarettes were nothing to do with me or anyone in my flat, and she did not apologise for her actions....she simply said 'we no longer had a problem'

lastnight i was on the phone to my partner at maybe 9.30 /10pm...we ended up having a slightly heated discussion and raised our voices! we could only have been doing this for 15 minutes maximum..at around 10.15pm
my neighbour banged on my door violently...i did not answer (i was in my pyjamas and not in the mood to deal with her) i assumed it was her as noone else in my building would be so rude, and i guess the reason was that my raised voice had disturbed her!

 

ok...well thats good to know...im not a noisy person, normally im by myself in my flat, occasionally having people for dinner etc, i dont have party's and i see myself as a generally considerate person.
My partner was living with me for a while, but he had to move back to the UK for work...whilst he was here she left me alone more, but since he moved out she has started to complain again....
anyway ill try the ignoring tactics - i just want to be able to get on with my life in peace to be honest!